Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
I just got asked by a man in the alley if i would like to buy 50 dollars of meat for 20 bucks. Its been a weird day.
I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
I always have to poop after I paint my nails. It never fails.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
no. you're not making a beach trip out of my abortion.
I can now tell my grandchildren Central Park has really great spots for quickies...
I still can't believe he turned down that threesome with us in central park. He must be really committed.
Just had a flashback of dry humping a man lying in the street while Jim (dressed as santa) screams 'HAVE YOU BEEN A GOOD BOY?!'
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I went on my dinner date pretending that my lunch date didn't jizz in my hair.
my new years resolution to eat more toast and mastrubate more often is going well so far.
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
Question: the touchscreen on my phone randomly quit working, do you think this could be a latent reaction from me peeing on my phone last weekend?
No I got a fucking mosquito bite on my vagina. Summer is off to a bumpy start.
My ex's sister asked me to be her date to Thanksgiving. Should I go?
Threesome!
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