i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
I caught a rooster roaming Edison Park then released it in the bar. They made me try to catch it again and somebody played the chicken dance while I chased it
My dealer, who also happens to be a male stripper, just invited me to watch him perform tonight. Boundaries buddy, boundaries.
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
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I pretty much just threw a bunch of clothes and my vodka in a bag..idk where I'm gonna end up tonight but I'm prepared.
Mym mom just came downstairs as I got ghome ans I'm trying to act SO CASUAL as i stabdh here hut icant help bur be like 'girl where's ther Turkey sandwiche s' haahaa
I literally need you to talke care of me soooo9o9oooooo drubj gril makin a sabdwiche. SO far its judst bred and paper towel...
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
I've already reverted to sweat pants. And lonely drinking.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just so we're clear this time around: This is dinner with my FAMILY. Not an opportunity for you to drink too much, and use the word "dick-thumpin" in casual conversation.
Can I interview you during sex or would that be weird?
All I ever do is give guys anxiety problems and flaccid penises.
Thank you for stroking my rage monster tonight.
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
The party pretty much ended once she shit on the couch
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