I've seriously contemplated telling him the baby isn't his just so I can meet Maury Povich
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
Yeah, I was googling pictures of sharks, and I accidentally typed "shart." Huge mistake.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
in case you havent found it already in honor of Toy story 3 we wrote ANDY on the bottom of your foot while you were passed out on the couch.
I feel the need to send all my exes pictures of penises larger than theirs. Because they all must suffer.
Its bad when you wake up with a penis drawn on your face. Its worse when you find out its traced..
He's super sweet. I feel like I'm dating Elmo. If Elmo had a 7 incher
This is what happens when you leave: I get all vulnerable and I make out with the cowboy to shut him up about Jesus.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
When's the last time you had sex near some ducks?
FUCK YEAH PUPPY BOWL
Do toy wanna orseer frim onedof tjose plaves? Sry textimg with globes on
Gloves*
Out of all the words to correct, you chose gloves??
Probably some sort of karmic revenge for me looking at titties somewhere along the way
and for that you shall suffer
God: I won't strike you down, but I shall introduce your child to Doja Cat during a quarantine
So my best friends wedding ended with everyone seeing me getting eaten out behind the forbes church. Classy!
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