So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
i can totally tell he's high. he's having a conversation with my dog.
Sex has been so nonexistent lately that when I was masturbating the other day, I actually paused to yawn.
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't have enough holes for all these australians
Are you dead or are you taking another 13 hour nap? you need to let me know these things ahead of time so i dont worry.
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
What has two arms, one testicle and no credit card debt? This guy.
Traded my phone for pizza, then got it back this morning....successful night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am not saying having unprotected sex in my boss' pool was a good idea, I am just saying it wasn't my worst idea of the summer.
The second I see you we're shot gunning beers
It's gonna be 8 o'clock in the morning
And your point is?
Marry me
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
I thought 5 times was beyond my capabilities but her tongue was like a penis defibrillator. Clear!
I just showed this kid my nipples to work my shift tmw
If it makes you feel better he's in the stall next to me and I'm taking a diabolical shit. He's complaining
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