Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
Is there a nice way to say "I like you, but I hate your dick?"
while being fingered today, I was told I have an abnormally deep g-spot. Now you know, I am a size queen because of SCIENCE.
She's the barista slut.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nothing like a 3am firealarm to kick a booty call out...
There's a mouse. In the house. By the cans. With some pans. Release the cat. To eat his hat. Sorry about the mess. Of my breakfest.
No but seriously, there's a fucking mouse in the house by the beer cans
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
if masturbating while stoned isn't called "weed whacking" then i just don't know how to live my life anymore
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You didn't try to help me when I fell on the dance floor. She brought me cupcakes. You're a shitty friend, suck your own dick.
I achieved maximum drunk last night. It was pretty extreme. Woke up on a couch, outside, in a suit
My cat is watching me play with my new vibrator
Y’all did coke off my Puff The Magic Dragon plate.😂
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
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