I just saw a guy masturbating vigorously at the bus stop across from del taco at 2:30am...im pretty sure he wasn't even homeless
the best part was when he threw his debit card on the table, looked at everyone and said "turn this into pizza!" It felt like a scene in a 'coming of age' teen comedy.
what do 4 police cars, 1 ambulence, and 2 fire truycks have in common?.... My driveway
Wearing the BK Crown on the throne while dropping the kids off at the pool? Yes, one of my life's goals. Win
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
all I remember is repeatedly winking at the fire marshall while he was counting the people in the bar
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
You're in the clear; you and Andrew did not joint fingerbang that girl on the dance floor last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
dude she got out of bed and definitely took a shit then checked her stomach out in the mirror and whispered "well that probably took off five pounds"
It was inevitable. It was like I was a caterpillar and now I'm a drunk and high butterfly
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
Never do acid then ask for a blow job while watching 28 Days Later. Heed my advice.
i said cake fell into my bra, you stood up and yelled "Im coming soldier", leaped acrossed the couch and started motorboating my boobs. i would have been cool with it if your mom didnt keep calling me the "lesbiainizer"
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
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