Whats the glycemic index on semen?
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
you puked out of a dead sleep and didnt wake up
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I swear I only do things like fuck 19 yr olds just to hear how you laugh when I tell you.
He just told me he's been drinking vodka at work all day. I'm starting to believe in soul mates.
He's so drunk he thinks he's the ultimate warrior. Told cops he was from parts unknown. Never broke character
No one is allowed to go to bed until all bottles are finished, I don't want to feel my face tongiht. Do you understand?
he told me he had a dream that he laid his head in my lap and silently gazed up at me. WHY AM I ALWAYS THE DUDE IN RELATIONSHIPS
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
You don't usually get feedback after a one night stand... But you hit it out of the park. I'm proud to call you a friend.
Fuck you. I've got onesies to keep me warm at night. And this bottle.
We are gonna play a game I like to call what the fuck is in my pocket
He is 6'5, went to a Christian school and he's a violinist....I'm going to fuck the jesus right out of him.
I don't think getting eaten out in a smart car behind a circle-k on my break by a guy I just met classifies as social distancing, but I'm beginning to love night shift more and more.
Randomize