Sometimes your consistent use of proper punctuation makes me nervous D:
I want my own midget army. I think I would be a good midget army leader.
I think he was having a seizure but nobody knew because 'what is love' was playing
Just got the orientation leader spot. For the first two days, I will be one of the best looking guys on campus. The freshman girls will be so disappointed they settled for me when everyone else comes back.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My dick just stopped my iPhone from falling into the toilet.
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
What bar did i puke in last night
by bar you must mean bars and by in you must mean on
You can wear my underwear. It'll be like old times.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My boob is missing a layer of skin
He started tongueing his parfait and told "thats what I'd to your ass" in the middle of Starbucks. Of course i brought him home
Do you ever look back on your life and think - man I should have never had sex with that guy
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
Sex on the trampoline with your two best friends cheering you on: PRICELESS.
If you wake up, and some of your hair is singed off, it probably has something to do with the lit cigarette you put in your hair. You said it could double as a bobby pin...?
Randomize