..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
he's mad because you were 'slandering his penis'.
I think I should just go up to him and say, "before I invest time in this could I just take a look at your penis?"
i will trade you pizza and a blowjob for a fifth of vodka.
do i get to eat the pizza while you give me the blowjob?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
She just told me she had a double jointed jaw and winked at me while eating her bananna. That's not possible right?
If I can't get slightly excited by the thought of his face between my legs then I know I can never sleep with him.
I just wanna go somewhere and not be judged for wearing spandex shorts that make my ass look like a slice of fucking heaven. Is that so much to ask??
YOU ARE TAKING ADVANTAGE OF MY INEBRIATED STATE
YOU ARE DRUNK AND USED AND SPELLED THE WORD "INEBRIATED" CORRECTLY. I AM TAKING ADVANTAGE OF NOTHING.
I CAN'T HELP THAT I'M MULTITALENTED YA FUCKER
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
someday i'll meet a woman who will love me for my marvelous breasts and ignore my many character faults.
looked up people from my old yearbooks. 3 ex boyfriends are gay. im getting drunk now.
Did she seriously come back inside just to piss on the kitchen floor?
I made it out of the house. Success.
It's not better out here. I'm at Target hyperventilating in the aisles.
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