someone put bongwater in my humidifier again THIS NEEDS TO STOP
I dont care how high you are, meat and sprinkles dont mix dude
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
That combination of brocholi bacon eggs cheese ketchup and pasta would have been a revaltion had you not thrown up on the stove and put out the pilot light
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The only way i can get arrested is public drunkenness or defacing a national monument. Trust me, i have already looked it up.
I woke up at 5:47 in the morning to you peeing on my parents bedroom floor. I think we've established that you have a limit .
At least I can pee in a cup like a champ at this point
Between the puerto rican elf, the fat marine, the deaf guy and the ex coke head I've got a good preview if the men in this city...
I gave you the craziest sex experiences of your life, the least you could do is let me keep the sweater.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
Guys, as my favorite vagina consultants I have to share something.
My professional advice is not to put lemons in your lady pocket.
driving home hungover today was like a life test..it was like the goblet of fire
If you fuck up my birthday by dying I will kick your fucking corpse.
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
I just slept for fifteen hours straight. It's like my body knows i'm drinking with you and is preparing..
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