the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
Sometimes I worry for your future but then I remember how big your boobs are.
i found the one person in the world who takes longer to cum than i do... mutual dissatisfaction is probably not the best foundation for a relationship.
We found her on the trampoline. She told us she was jumping so she could puke & rally. I think I want to marry her.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have got to stop making out with redheads. I need to sign my life over to my dad like Britney Spears.
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
You insisted we help some homeless guy put up posters for his missing pet alligator so we left you there because they were really just Chinese takeout menus.
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
I just realized that I have to choose between a future orthopedic surgeon and a dude currently in jail. My life is so fucked.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you've never been partying there before, take Shae with you. Drunk Shae is like a GPS. She found us the only bottle shop still open at four, a pot dealer, and told us all which subway to take to get home. She'd never been to Madrid before. It was awesome.
There's a whistle here and I just want to play my whistle song on it.
You're the only person I know that could get laid while visiting their grandpa in florida
I just woke and boke and made apple pancakes. I'm kicking Monday in the dick.
It's the third day of class and I got told I smell like a distillery.
I refuse to go to a doctor for a sex injury, not when I've come so far already
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