i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
Im in the beachers at wrigley listening to four lesbians debate the pros and cons of 2girls1cup. Success.
You stood in front of a yellow Camaro and kept yelling at it to "Transform already!!!!".. yeah, I'd say you were pretty wasted.
My broken door handle makes it really inconvient for when i need to puke at red lights.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
please come over and have sex with me so we can talk about prom and kill 2 birds with one condom
So last night ended up making out with a girl going to jail on sunday...she wrote down her address so I can make conjugal visits...
Slow dancing with the chandelier.
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I heard the bride mutter "I should have brought a fucking tranquilizer". I'm not at all surprised that you got banned from the bar afterwards.
It was inevitable. It was like I was a caterpillar and now I'm a drunk and high butterfly
How many Wendy's frosties do you think it would take to fill a bathtub?
I'm slacking. We've been hooking up for months and I have yet to bang him while he's wearing the clown mask.
His birthday is on cinco de mayo and he doesn’t drink or like tacos. What a waste.
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
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