oh my god I didn't know your sister was this good at french kissing
she gave me a schnouzer then wanted to kiss while we were having sex...i had to puppy slap her nose. pick me up out front.
Weirdest conversation with my dad. He just told me he didn't shave his pubes.
She said I wasn't helping her abandonment issues by not responding to her texts at 4 am
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The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
Just think, this time last Cinco de Mayo you were holding me up and finding me passed out in the yard of that house.
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
i have my bailey's and coffee which lasts me until lunch, at which time its appropriate for me to bring a vodka and OJ mix for the afternoon. This university thing is grrreat
I've just never heard the term serendipitous used to describe having one's asshole licked.
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Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
i just found my fake in the snow. LIFE IS AWESOME
I woke up in a stranger's bed wearing nothing but santa socks.
I'm tripping pretty hard right now but every time a Volvo drives by I feel like everything is gonna be alright
Some how my underwear was hanging from the antlers of a antelope head on the wall of the hotel........
Welp. June's off to a great start. I just ripped my pants, completely sober, at 10:30 p.m.
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