i just puked in front of my entire floor a girl on crutches asked iof i needed help hahaaa fuck ima damn fool
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
Then you ran outside and said you were gonna give the snowman a blowjob
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
Do you remember Kelly my alter personality? She talked like a man and would sing amazing grace?
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
She crossed her eyes and threw up into a glass while sitting at the bar. It was fifty shades of sketchy dude.
Is it acceptable to have my intern get me pedialite and plan b?
It's a learning experience. She can add to her resume that she cured her bosses hangover and poor decisions
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
if you're the one who put those dollar bills in my bra last night, thank you because I just used that money to get myself a coffee
Bitch are you kidding? 2016 is gonna be the year our pussies run for president
He got punched in the face last night? By who? I’ll invite him to our formal. Seriously.
You really need to not quote Anchorman while I'm giving you a serious blowjob.
The air I exhale reeks of whiskey and bad decisions
You don't need yoga. You need a boyfriend! Trust me I've become all sorts of flexible this past year.
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