if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
Yeah, he said he was getting "welcome back Winnipeg Jets drunk" then puked on his jersey.
There's always one sober annoying person at a party. I hate responsible people. I just wanted to show everyone my nipples. There cute. She didn't have to stop me
One is full of apple juice. One is full of tequila. This is real russian roulette my friend.
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Kinda forgot to grab tampons. Mind if I run to my house to get one? I'd rather not turn my green skinny jeans Christmas colors
dude, I convinced you I was your conscience for like 15 minutes last night. you weren't just "a little high"
I woke up and there was pizza slices on the fucking walls of my room
So here's a brief summary of my weekend: last night I drank four glasses of Death Punch, grabbed the toaster, said "This is mine", put it in my pants and walked out the front door.
It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You threw a handful of caps into a pitcher of Heineken and asked everyone if they wanted to go "bobbing for molly"
I'm wandering around outside asking things if they are god
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
my roommate had drunk sex above me in our bunk bed and then built me a fort to apologize the next day
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
The only words I could make out were "Dicksmash McIroncock".
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