are you looking for your table cloth? Cause I found it around my neck this morning...
terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
My own mom unfriended me on Facebook.
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
beyond obliterated. i recall legitimately trying to use a ballpoint pen as eyeliner.
I will never swim in a flooded basement again..
The last thing I remember before blacking out was telling Jamie that she was too fat even for my standards. The first thing I remember after blacking out was waking up next to her.
His IQ is so high, I swear I started ovulating when he told me the number.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
We found her on the doorstep. Just layin down going, "I made it home!! Aren't you proud??!"
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
Whatcha doing tonight? Reply TURNUP if you are drinking, or STOP to cancel messages
Still drunk. lying on the floor just rubbing my cats nipples
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