This girl is more easily done than said...
he invited me to an all week drinking party at his house. apparently he knows the key to my heart is booze shaped.
The reason halloween exists is because it's not cheating if you're wearing a costume.
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am watching the CFL at a Hooters in Texarakana. I made a poor life choice at some point that led me here.
Well apparently I'm no fun since I won't have a threesome with him and my mother.
could you please explain to me why my jumper cables are on my bedroom floor?
I GOT A VENDING MACHINE FOR OUR LIVING ROOM
I have vodka soaked strawberries. My latest tarot card reading hinted at a lesbian/bisexual coming out. I doubt I survive the night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
I'm tripping pretty hard right now but every time a Volvo drives by I feel like everything is gonna be alright
he left a full can of coors light underneath my windshield wiper, like a love note. if that's not husband material, i don't know what is
even my drug dealer wished me a happy birthday before my mother did.
Being an adult can't be all bad. I just took a vacation day solely to sit around and get stoned
scale of one to ten how loathsome is it to save my chocolate easter bunny to use for a topping on my edibles
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