i have a "get your shit together" dinner with my parents tonight. After that ill be down to party
Jenna and Ryan are ranting and raving about child custody. MY VASECTOMY SMILES.
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
just remind me when i get fired soon that august is the month i started pregaming work
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's a paramedic out here, what have you done?
Do you think it's illegal to work at a bar if you're on probation for a DUI? I need a night job where I can meet men.
Too much alcohol and too many lesbians. I can officially say I have regrets now. At least that's something.
He looks like a fat version of lurch from the adams family and smells like fritos. This is not the caliber man I want pleasuring himself to the thought of me!
I'm studying. And by studying I mean I am laying on my floor drinking boones farm alone. Last two weeks. Fuck it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
like, is this a date?? I'm sitting on his couch drinking a juice box while he makes taquitos in sweat pants
I've had to take two showers today and it's not even 1 o'clock. Why won't this weekend wash off?
...Just this whole adulting thing gets in the way of mermaid drag shows at lesbian bars.
My neighbor was my D.A.R.E officer and I feel like I've defeated him by smoking weed outside everyday
I just saw a guy in a zippo shirt buy 2 gallons of fire starter fluid and then proceed to smoke a cigarette. I feel like hes got some big plans for his tuesday.
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
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