Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
he wants to bone in the snuggie
Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I'm banging this nun...
Isn't that how all good stories start? I like it already...
I woke up to her vacumming the grass
i would eat my own dick if it were covered in nutella
It was smashing those cupcakes into my face that did it. Junk food and I don't mix.
... I went down on him at the movies. I feel like Alanis Morisette.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you don't know what its like to have your bartender tell you that you owe him beer money infront of your mother at 3pm on a tuesday
Bacon Cheddar rum burgers are as great as they sound. I knew that 100 proof Captain would be good for something other than vomit.
For thanksgving we are only drinking wild turkey for the next 24hrs time to strap your balls back on and maybe a helmet
Ps we bought 8 pellet guns just now
This lady gave me four cups to go along with my gallon of daiquiri. Silly girl, all I need is a straw.
Word my sister pulled through for me and brought vodka shooters for the plane. its about to be a sloppy 4 hours
What's the point of having a gay best friend if he doesn't play with your titties?
Randomize