forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
I am going to be in the room whjen you have your first child and spit on its face before its even all the way out of you.
They all laughed at me when I bought that necklace from Life Alert. Who's laughing now?
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We got to the party at eleven, and the host was already in the hospital from being stabbed. And she brought the stabber home with us when we left.
I looked up while we were having sex to see him covering my pillow pet's eyes with his free hand. I think I'm in love
hey this is Madison. you gave me your number last night and asked me to remind you that you didn't fuck anyone. you okay?
After you bought Jesus' name tag off him at the Mexican restaurant you commenced to stumbling around the lobby showing anybody who would listen what would Jesus do.
Stop giving me tequila.
At what point did you realize I was getting blown under the table during our dominos game?
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its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
There's a kid in the back of the class drinking out of a flask. Like what is going on?
NOW HE'S DRINKING OUT OF A HANDLE. WHO IS THIS KID?
Ok next time we are filming it. You bring the camera and I'll buy more socks
Just had an emotional break through with the dog. That high.
Say thank you and give him a blowjob.
I don't actually like you. I just want to hook up with you.
I'm fine with that
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