JOSHUA! WE ARE SO BREAKING UP!
what?
YOU'RE DRUNK AGAIN, ARENT YOU?!
I spent my night drunkenly staring at a picture of John Stamos. How do you think I feel?
Dude, at this rate we're going to get arrested a second time tonight.
All I need in life is some dick and a big mac.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
Thinking about adopting a 16 yr old here. Her name is Abby and she likes vodka. We've bonded. I need a sober driver n e ways...
asked the cab driver where he learned Swahili last night.
There is a really great story behind the missing Coco Puffs and vodka mystery
Letting two friends screw at my place in exchange for weed. This is my life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
She was wearing American flag underwear. How could I NOT fuck her?
You're a true patriot.
I wanted to write an apology letter to my vagina after that.
I traded some nice guy at the bar ten bucks and a pack of cigarettes for his leather jacket. I'm pretty sure I win at life. Whoever is in my phone as Tyler Durden, I thank you.
I just fucked her boyfriend. Happy birthday, bitch.
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