your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
i think i will get a tattoo on my butt that says "im not bluffin with my muffin", but i guess if i was serious, i would get it above my c-section scar
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think her nose is broken... but I think she's just drunk enough to fall for the whole "sex releases endorphins, so it'll feel better" line.
Girl your like that last load of laundry... I'll do you eventually just not tonight.
The nurse who basically saved my life just came into the store. Didn't recognize her. Awwwwkward.
I'm just so happy. I go to sleep and when I wake up there will be chocolate milk and penis.
Why is "Oprah of drinks" written on my arms?
You said to write it on you, after you kept saying, "You get a drink, you get a drink, everyone gets a drink."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Good to know. If our sexting moves past early 1900s vernacular, I'll be sure to use that once or twice.
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
Your skill with memes is vaguely frightening
I should probably apologize for licking you last night since you drove me home, but I stand by my decision
Just ordered a pregnancy test off amazon. Fuck 2019
Saw a sign that said the chorus of never gonna give you up was enough time to wash your hands. Coronavirus has Rick rolled me.
Randomize