Can you check your dirty laundry bag for my tooth.
Besides the whole peeing blood for a week thing, it was the best sex of my life.
Actually, considering the facts that I am wearing a duct tape dress and eating a gas station quesadilla, I am pretty good.
I probably looked like a mental patient. I had my IV in one hand and cup of pee in the other, swaying around with a dazed grin on my face. I love vicodin.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
i'm sad to say... seems like women around here set up their armageddon booty calls ahead of time. wanna fill all these condoms with tequila and head downtown???
Yeah. I mean it wasn't that awkward. I just made conversation like there was absolutely no lack of pants.
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
Just walked by the barren window naked in a family neighborhood. Who needs dignity.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just had to pick up my "let's drink and make bad choices" hat, my banana suit and beer pong table from work. Until just then I couldn't figure out why I got fired.
This whole pope visit thing is ruining me having sex.
I almost rear ended this hot guy driving a Porsche Cayenne just so I could get his phone number
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
My face is going numb. I think it's time I call it quits
Randomize