Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
there is mayo everywhere what the fuckkkk
because you can't take the autistic girl you're babysitting on a blunt ride.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
Either this is the best sandwich I've ever had, or my stomach is just relieved to have something in it that's not Red Bull or semen.
im sorry but you know it was a good night when you got tasered on the ass and didnt even feel it
I've been timing it. He's been showering alone for 33 minutes. 4 minutes ago, he said "truth or dare." haven't heard anything since.
I had 5 long islands and 2 alien brain hemorrhages…I am entirely certain that the "power hour to finish the night" idea was just too much.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just got a blowie during the Avengers. It's weird knowing that the high point of your life just happened.
I might have beaten my fastest all time record going from "I really really like this girl" to "fuck that bitch"
On her way to bed she said, "If you have sex on the couch, just move my blanket" Needles to say, we moved the blanket
Nothing like waking up and having two guys who aren't your boyfriend talk to you about their hard dicks before 9 am.
Of fucking course I get my period on Valentine's Day...
I would totally suck a dick for some poutine right now
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