you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
She called me Spock and proceeded to ask me to 'teach her the ways of the force'. I just couldn't do it after that. No way am I fucking a girl who can't tell the difference between Star Wars and Star Trek.
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
Whatever, she only has 293 friends, she cant afford to be defriending me..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After we had sex he bought me grape soda. I think I'll keep him.
Need to stop getting stoned with this chick, I keep waking up covered in pizza sauce
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
He just asked me to pee through my panties while he watched. I might need more tequila for this one.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My roomate asked me why she found condoms in the pringles container. I don't know what to tell her
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
I really want to text him and congratulate him on having a bigger penis than the guy I dumped him for, but I thought that might be awkward...
I want to throw all of their shoes in the pool so I feel like there is some justice in the world
Why do I have a bunch of cash....and your bra.
On Friday, can we drink like its Civil Wars times and the doctor's coming to saw off our gangreen infected legs?
Randomize