I mixed the ketchup wit the mustard in one bottle to save time making hotdogs
Captain Phil from deadliest catch died... im trying to think of a memorial fb status but "ill miss your crabs" doesnt sound right
I love Japanese schoolgirls with short skirts riding bikes on windy days.
You're never coming back, are you?
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I legit just woke up on my couch, snuggled up next to some guy who's wearing my roommate's pink bathroble. What the fuck do they put in those shots?
You and Eric are like slutty bowling balls, and that poor family are the pins. They won't know what hit em.
strike, motherfucker.
Tell Taylor to rock on. Tell her she is so beautiful that the sun shines down on her face and shows her beauty. Tell her to live on, like Martin Luther King. He'll never die. He's living his dreams.
dont iron anything. we fucked on the ironing board. details to follow.
I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
Let's never forget the time I met you while you were running down the street naked and in handcuffs.
I HATE HIM SO MUCH I HOPE HE GETS IN SOME WEIRD ACCIDENT WHICH MAKES IT IMPOSSIBLE FOR HIM TO NUT
Honestly it was like 3 AM and I only agreed to go to the strip club because I wanted chicken tenders
Currently eating a pop tart in my underwear waiting for the washer. Not one of my prouder moments.
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
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