I'm watching the red sox through my neighbors window from my bathroom. We're winning btw.
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
nothing like walking down the street with a garbage bag of puke trying to find a dumpster
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's amazing I mean I blew that senator just for him to deny me marriage.... Politics suck and he swallowed!
want to know what my life has come to? I just took a 45 min shower banging on the walls and making loud sex noises so my neighbors think I get some.
I can't tell if I have the Pizza Hut shits or beer shits
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
I spent $31 at mcdonalds last night. Threw my nuggets all over the yard, ate them out of the snow, picked a fight about it, vomited, then passed out.
Naked.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were banging then all I remember is coming down hard and smashing my top teeth off his forehead. I just rolled off and tapped out. Done-zo
I feel like Captain Morgan shit all over my hopes and dreams last night...
Is there a polite/non-lush way to ask how alcohol ranks on their list of priorities? Because like idk how to break the ice furreal.
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
he's the kind of guy you give a fake number to and he still finds out your real number anyway...
Too high to wash a dish but just high enough for a kitchen fire
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