Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
you rubbed the head of my dick and said "I shall call you Squishy and you shall be mine and you shall be my Squishy."
I accidentally requested the ides of march off instead of st patricks day. Is this an omen? will alcohol be my brutus?
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
He broke up with me over the phone while I was getting my bush waxed into a "D" for his surprise birthday present. Talk about bad timing...
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
YOU ARE SO GOD DAMN LOUD AND YOU'RE SHAKING THE GOD DAMN HOUSE. FUCKING STOP.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
One day I'll learn not to get drunk on a plane. Today is not that day.
1. so the new neighbor u called dibs on.. I'm sorry..but not really. 2. She lactates, I guess that happens when you have a kid less then 5 months ago.... WTF!! 3. Is it fucked up I'm craving Ceral & Milk now?
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
i just has to use a gift card to Target that one of my students parents got me to buy Plan B bc my bank account is -$0.08 so my 2017 is starting exactly how i pictured.
Don't put me in that position. I am not qualified to be the responsible adult here.
I wasn't going to drink. Then there was alcohol so I gave that up.
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