It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
Hello Stephanie, you need to come pick me up at Par Blvrd correctional facility and bring $750-$1000 for bail. I just got a DUI. Thank you.
What!?!?! How are you txting?!
Because this is Officer Reynolds, and I just arrested your boyfriend.
shes laying on the floor in a bowl of salsa with her pants half off and she's crying... i dont know what to do...
I will pray to the gods of eye bleach for you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey do you think you can sew an adult onsie with easy access if you know what I mean!!?? It must have bunny feet.
I don't give a damn about what he wants to do with his life. Personalities are for pussies.
I don't understand how 5 bottles of booze became normal or acceptable per 2.5 people
Do you remember using the vicegrip to demonstrate how wide your penis is?
I just spent my entire state tax return on sex toys
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have no idea why my husband is mad that I came home at 4 am & all I want to do is eat spaghettios. It's not fucking spaghettios fault.
Being a slave to ur dick is exhausting.
He deserves a nobel prize for his dick-giving abilities. 10/10, would ride again.
Dude, fuck these noisy kids, fuck all this light, and fuck you for getting to sleep while I have to be productive and hungover.
Dude my toilet did not deserve what I just did to it
i just read a article called "Booze, Drugs, and Bipolar Disorder"... i think someone is writing the memoirs of my life
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