Just saw the true definition of the muffin top and camel toe all on one person at the DC zoo... Tried to take a pic but she got away..
Care to explain to me why theres a baby food jar filled with semen in my fridge? or why its labeled as unicorn sweat?
Can you put "designated driver" on a resume?
There's people holding up abortion signs everywhere. I guess the people of Florida want you to remember you fucked up on Spring Break.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's not weird mascara. I just have puke crusted on my eyelashes.
Remind me to tell you the "if you give a mouse a special brownie" story when you get back
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh. I'm probably going to just get a viagra and ruin your life.
I wish I saved his nudes so I could anonymously submit them to his tumblr
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
I'm just saying, I walked in on you blowing a burrito. I now understand how obsessed you are with Taco Bell. And how long it's been since you've got some.
Im just drunk enough to admit that I miss Hannah Montana.
Definitely went to court without a bra and panties because Mr. LastNight’s dog stole them. I guarantee you I was the only lawyer going commando in court
Randomize