I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
Sitting at a red light. Windows are down. I'm blasting Gaga's "Disco Stick" and doing an interpretive dance to it because I think I'm hilarious. Look to the left and see two Phi Delts that I know with their windows down. They are horrified. I am probably going to lose their Facebook friendships.
I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
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Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
Seriously. Doesn't matter if I went out last night, work is like crafts class w.a side of facebook
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
He's my palate cleanser. He's my mint sorbet. He's my saltine cracker. He's who I fuck between people to make the next one better.
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I'd invite him but there's too many people who have fucked me going already
Uhh dog found a condom. FYI its on the table by couch please dispose of it. No reply Necessary
I'm using the Malibu pitcher you stole from the bar to make pancakes this morning. It's actually working really well.
I just cut open the plastic package of a Plan B pill using the bottle opener I carry in my purse. #whyidrink
DAMN HIS BEARD AND ABILITY TO USE TOOLS ON A LADDER!!
Leave it to my mom and I to turn the hearing into a drinking game.
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