im using the astroglide sample u sent me as a bookmark for the book im using to write my midterm paper. i need to get laid. bad.
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm going through a really dark time right now
I don't want to hear it man. I just jerked it to a pic of my ex wife in a bikini. Buck up
I promised him we could have sex if he would let me take him to the hospital to get stitches.
Why were you not born a dude?
Because god wanted to level the playing field
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
I feel bad cuz I was his ride home, but I didn't know I was going to have a religious experience with a guy in a cookie monster t-shirt. You can't plan for that shit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
I pretended to be blind and he pretended to be my assistant and long story short, we had to buy that bra and panty set, and now we're both banned from Victoria's Secret AND I have a cum stained demi cup.
And pointless. I'm fully vested in all my calories coming from booze today. The salad just fucks that shit up
I'm just bringing him "breakfast," and breakfast may lead to lunch and dinner, but that doesn't mean I want the mealplan.
Periods are much less exciting when you're not sexually active.
He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!
Randomize