absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
It was not a dingleberry, it was a dinglemelon
You know its bad when you can over hear the planned parenthood nurses talking shit behind your back... they've seen everything
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
Ok but if you die you have to get "I should've listened to Mike" carved into your tombstone
He gave me an orgasm before we even reached 2nd base, everything he did in high school is irrelevant.
I am as serious as getting herpes in Mexico...
What do herpes have to do with anything?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You offered me some of your "Jungle Juice." It was just 151 and Absinthe. I don't know how you are still alive.
and then i signed some dudes back with a turkey hand print in honor of thanksgiving
k. The important thing is we are going out. You are stones. I am mildly hallucenating.
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
the cashier at the gas station pulled a twig out of my hair and told me I should probably wash it before work....it was kinda sweet.
I need to align my fucking chakras
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