It was like a mary poppins bag, except a sexual mary poppins bag.
I have diapers under my sink. trying to convince myself to use them.
About to fuck some random fraternity guy I met at a party. I guess this would be the right time to say I don't want to be with you anymore.
No, that was the night I was sneezing out barf
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Now one day I will be able to tell my children how a drag queen in a gay bar told mommy that bin laden was dead
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
Every time I see him I get horny. I can't help it!
Just stop. You're making other wives look bad. We are all starting to hate you.
Did i tell you that he's legal and i got his number? Because he's legal and i got his number. THIS BITCH AIN'T GOING TO JAIL YET
Think of something healthy and responsible. Now think of the exact opposite, let's do the latter
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You walked up to a random girl on the street and asked her for a bite of her pizza...
I'm not gonna ask the guy I've fucked like 3 times if he is insecure about his eyebrows.
All I want is to get shitfaced and fuck random strangers is that really to much to ask?
My life is just a trash fire of work and Japanese video games now
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
I'll be coming off of 7 days of not drinking. No horse tranqs either. I haven't been this sober since I was in the womb
Randomize