people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
My low point of the night was when my roommate spit out her jello shot and i took it...
As I type I'm climbing my cousins swingset so I can take a nap inside the slide. Fuck this hangover. I always win.
So I'm trying to figure out if starting the day running around the quad in a black t-shirt and bikini w/ a drawn on mustache is a good way to start the day...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Slowly realizing that my only incentive to bathe is shower beer
Waking up to find your mom holding your birth control pills and telling you I suggest you take this
Nothing says "Good Morning" like Jell-o shots and coffee cakes.
I had a face to face conversation with her vagina, asking it not to make me look bad.
Hey I know you're not home, but I'm here. Your front door is unlocked and someone took shit on your doormat...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
While the bouncer was checking my purse, he found a bag of pasta noodles in it and asked me why I put them in my purse. I said to him: "So the guy knows I can cook."
if there is one thing you splurge on it better be nice condoms
there is absolutely nothing wrong with two grown men staying up all night blowing lines drinking white wine and playing call of duty. don't judge me
Just bought a dildo. Happy first time single in four years Valentine's Day to me
I'm drunk and he's still weird.
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
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