i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
please come you make the beer taste better
One of the cleaning ladies on my floor just screamed from the bathroom
i had to take my roommates dildo out of her suitcase so I could use it
the suitcase or the dildo?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Would you like to blur the lines between friendship and lesbianism tonight?
this is going to sound stupid but when I was drunk and thought I was a stripper where I did toss my pants?
Call me when you get up. This hang-over is like dismantling a bomb: I need someone to talk me through it.
After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
I have come to realize that my purpose in life is less musical and more as a filter of alcohol into water.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pounding your chest saying "me Tarzan" is not flirting or even talking
the new numbers in my phone would beg to differ
If I ever look like I'm about to have a repeat of last night, hit me. Just smack me as hard as you can.
He Dutch ovened me while I was hiding under the covers from his mom. Needless to say it did not end well.
My mom just called hysterical. She and her sister found my dead grandma's vibrator.
The apple don't fall far from that tree.
I have fence marks all over my body
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
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