New invention idea: vibrating tampons
I can't breathe out the right side of my face
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
i'm starting to get really nervous about the relationship i have with my cat
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You should really come over right now. There's hot construction workers across the street. I'm gonna go pour beer on myself in a bikini on the sidewalk. See you in 5?
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
it's 10:36pm. Do you know where your penis should be?
Can an epipen be used as a tranquilizer ?
"I'm in the bathroom. Only place I can sit and relax without that girl trying to give me a lap dance."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ok I've processed it. Who the fuck makes out drunk in a parking lot in a backseat with the windows down in the middle of the day?!?!
nothing like having plan b for breakfast in a cvs parking lot before ordering this semester's textbooks
you said it was a life or death situation, being your partner for beer pong doesn't count
The gyno waiting room is so strange because the pregnant woman next to me is making a PowerPoint of her pregnant photo shoot with her husband and I’m sitting here trying to figure out from Instagram who I had sex with on Sunday lol
She really wants to hug you. With her vagina.
How was I supposed to know the accent was fake before i slept with him
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