Dude, no joke... I lost my wedding ring in some skank last night
Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
it felt like a thousand fairies were licking my balls.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can we hire someone to dj while we have sex?
rumor has it I kept asking you to go to the "tall grass" with me...sorry about that.
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
Ice skating? Did you see me last night? I don't even know where my socks are
Nobody in the ambulance liked me...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I also love beards. The playoffs are like christmas for my vagina.
Peanut butter fills the cracks of my heart
we need to invent and abuse teleportation
The last thing I remember before blacking out was passing that sobriety test.
Finally got with the virgin.
Yeah? Howd that go?
As soon as I got it all the way in, I looked deep into her eyes and said "your soul is mine" in the deepest voice I could make. She was not amused.
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
Positive reviews on angieslist?
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