hot mess party of 2 ur bar is now available
So the bouncer told me I could leave the easy way or the hard way. I told him I was going to make him earn his 10 bucks that hour.
Apparently you chose the latter.
Last night you told her she was rocking the beer gut. Still wondering why you have that black eye?
Please tell me that text was part of your elaborate Brett Favre costume; otherwise, dude, wtf?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were on shrooms and "the trees are crazy green!" is all you could manage.
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
WHEN DO I FOLLOW THESE PEOPLE. I WOKE UP THIS MORNING &FOUND TWEETS FROM ILLUMINATI AND "hot shot 6th grader"
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I fucked some frat guy. Then I found my brother after and made him take his shirt off and then I made him tell me he loves me
So when he asked me to go on a date tonight, I didn't think the words "have you tried a suppository" would be part of the evening.
Disregard everything I texted you last night. Oh, and disregard me hooking up with your boyfriend.
Listen. The next time my first idea in the morning is "hometown buffet and a water bottle full of captain morgan", please make me go back to sleep.
My thoughts mid terrible hookup: do people normally read a magazine right about now?
ever feel bored AND lazy?
I call it "awake" but yeah...
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