so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
an unopened bag of salt and vinegar chips... probably the best thing I've ever found in my room while high.
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No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
We're not even buying beer. Just vodka. In pre-retrospect this was a bad idea but we're doing it anyway
This is the minute she broke up with me. If you're receiving this mass text, you are one for the girls who made me promise to text you at this point.
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Honestly I will go to church for him, I will even try to quit smoking for him. But his dick is not worth losing alcohol. He sure as fuck isn't taking away our wine nights.
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
No he's great. He's trying to do "sexy stuff" for me now, which is pretty hilarious. He stirred my daiquiri with his penis last night. He also tied a bouquet of flowers around it.
I just watched our fat male neighbor dibble a soccer ball across the lawn. It looked like Baywatch with diabetes
Please don't judge me for my hormonal purchase, judge me for my awesome rack.
I can't wait for you to tell me about your sex.
It's a short, short story.
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