I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
I hope you shit your pants in a socially devastating situation.
I just used a tire swing as a toilet. I think I'm gonna pass out here so I can see the look on the first kid who uses it in the morning.
We tried to play doctor all sexually then he was taking down my 'symptoms' I said I needed to puke he thought it was part of the game
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she was pooping while we were on video chat. new level of love.
Escaped ambulance. Meet me at your apartment.
nothing like baby laughter to ruin a masturbation moment
I'm such a fucking super-fan. I was worried his cum would wash away his autograph.
My mom just called me to tell me that i dont have chlamydia. Awkward.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up and found a doughnut on our front porch. It's not sketchy though. More like a gift from the gods.
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
I got so drunk I thought my tennis court was a corn field so I laid in it and ate pizza
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
You know how fear has a smell? Well turns out shame has a smell too. It's Pina colada flavored anal grease.
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