Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
WTF?! TAYLOR SWIFT JUST WON ARTIST OF THE YEAR OVER MICHAEL JACKSON?! WHAT IS THIS WORLD COMING TO?!
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
my credit card is covered in vodka and bad memories
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yes. It's so easy to pack to leave when you've thrown away half your clothing cause it smells like vomit.
I'm glad we have the kind of friendship where if either of us is too drunk to fuck a hot guy, we pass the responsibility to each other and get the job done.
I just re read that. We really need to get our lives together.
I woke up next to him fully clothed but my thong was around his neck. Polling to decide if we had sex or not starts now.
Not sorry that my walk of shame this morning was barefoot on my scooter.
dont iron anything. we fucked on the ironing board. details to follow.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
Says the girl who left her friends to go have phone sex in the bathroom at Michael's
Her son walked in on us and asked if he could "wrestle too."
I solemnly swear to help bail you out of jail when you throw a dildo at a politician.
just ran into my father at CVS while buying condoms...he winked at me. I really need to move out of this town.
Jello shots? I thought you weren't drinking tonight.
Im not drinking im slurping
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