all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
I just had a girl text me from knoxville "come see me. we'll go for drinks and I can make you breakfast"
how do you like your eggs?
over tits
so i was dancing to the glee soundtrack with highheels. i tripped. and the dildo fell on my face. i dont know what happened.
she said she didn't want to sleep with me again because I wasnt a generous lover. I ignored her slight moustache, didnt i? i think thats pretty damn generous
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
Lots of rum and cokes. Bartender wore my underwear on his head. Lost my keys. Accidentily started a fight. DC is going to kill me
I'll be on pinterest all night planning crafty things to do with my cats in 10 years.
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dammit labor day drinking cancelled due to 3 inch long table saw cut to palm
it's not like I want to die, I just want life to stop for a little bit. how does that work?
I'm studying. And by studying I mean I am laying on my floor drinking boones farm alone. Last two weeks. Fuck it.
Oh god, I forgot we had sex to Elton John
Im crying watching 9/11 footage eating spray can cheese in my pajamas.
He wanted me to do the rubix cube. He thought it was hot.
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