never play flip cup with pint glasses
PS- did you die? If you did just text "dead" to me, so that I know.
I showered today. Officially upgrading myself to useless.
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
I'm drinking a margarita out of my 'best bj' trophy and it tastes like victory.
Totally just grabbed the wrong dick. Damn this tequila.
weed salsa. i deserve a nobel prize
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
I've got a 90 day supply of amoxicillin in case of zombie or chlamydia outbreak
sometimes you just gotta eat tacobell at 2am and cry all your feelings out
I need a job that does not involve working with people who wear animal costumes when they get fucked.
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