I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
I just puked in the walgreens aisle buying gatorade and advil for my hangover... i guess i failed
She asked me how I live with myself. I told her one night at a time.
mom just asked if we are going to need more kaluha as she pulls 5 out of the cupboard. this xmas might kill me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The girl beside me at the laundromat is bitching a guy out on the phone for jizzing on her bedspread. She had to use a triple machine to wash it.
she found out just an hour ago that she might have cervical cancer. either way we're watching 50/50 and taking a shot of patron anytime anyone says cancer.
Me focusing on not shitting my pants is keeping me awake.
I'm cuddling with a baby pig and drinking champagne right now.
I want "hickeys on my ass" sex
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
What?! Why else would they put table cloths on a table if not for discreet oral sex? That's why they were invented! Read a book...
Uhh dog found a condom. FYI its on the table by couch please dispose of it. No reply Necessary
my dad just built a flame thrower.. you should probably get here
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
If the amount of time the owner spent looking at my tits is any indication, I’d say I can probably sleep my way to the top
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