Maybe if i eat something filling like whole wheat pasta it will make me less hungry for things like dick
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
she crawled under her car and passed out. Unfortunately her feet were sticking out and someone called 911 because they thought she had been run over.
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
And I feel bad.
Because we're having a serious discussion about our sex life and you're playing minecraft?
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
After you threw up you would repeatedly say "napkin" like a siren until somebody got you a fucking napkin.
I just want a teacup pet pig so I can take him to parties with me and never have to walk home alone again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Toppless hop-scotch needs to become a competitive sport
im lying in bed trying to choke myself out because being awake hurts too much
The first crop top of the year and you're rocking it in the ER. #ratchet
What is my life?
Dude someone puked in a bowl n put it in the fridge. I thought it was salsa! Who does that?
Nothin much, just sipping warm franzia from a plastic valentines wine glass while wrapped in my Mexican blanket listening to sappy country songs and mourning my lack of a love life. Hbu?
I don’t know what language he speaks but I know my boobs will translate just fine
I’m looking forward to few days of international relations
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