i had to pay fifty dollars for throwing up in the limo, 60 fucking dollars to throw up all over myself
just walk of shamed past a man riding a bike. RIDING A BIKE. what a wholesome life he must lead.
Blow job bear ended up in my bed last night. She didn't live up to her costume.
You were such a shitshow...I was just standing in the kitchen eating my toaster strudel and you came in, whispered "you didn't see anything" and led him to the couch
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am in a hotel room with 10 people. John is in bed eating an industrial sized pan of mashed potatoes. I think a non insignificant number of people saw my nipples.
They kept barging in on us saying random shit. At one point they came in yelling room service! and threw soda at us bruising my foot. Weirdest injury I have gotten during sex.
There a special place in hell for drunk criers. A special FUCKING PLACE
Oh my god he's laying on a longboard singing the song from cool runnings.
"He was so not worth staining my backseat for."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
just chugging fertility tea and vodka, no big deal.
Ok. You have started something that can only end with a picture of the inside of my butthole. It may happen today or next year, but it's on my agenda.
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
We stood outside the room listening to them have sex and making meow noises
That's not right, is it?
I have blood and BBQ sauce all over my shirt. I blame you for the blood.
Randomize