And we will make penis cookies and eat them suggestively
It's sad how good I am at giving people diseases
i have no idea who im with but someones making meatballs. im going to stay.
i walked in on him listening to enya, jacking off, and vomiting into a cup on his desk. are you serious.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
as my niece was drinking milk out of a crown royal glass i realized i dont think i've ever bought a glass that didnt come with a bottle of liquor....
I took my shirt off and stood in the kitchen for an hour and a half talking to his parents about my tattoos
sitting in my room in a shopping cart. they couldnt get my legs out of the holes. i want breakfast.
Tried to dodge fire in poncho. Fell through fence. Blood everywhere.
I think Facebook knows you fucked me. All of a sudden I get everything you do in my news feed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
There must be a happy medium universe where you get it on with my girlfriend enough to cause me pain but not a full on cardiac arrest. It's a fine line to tread though.
When was the last time you wore pants?
Time is relative.
And pants are optional.
You're going to be mad because I got baked, but not that mad because I'm bringing home kfc.
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
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