Duck Duck Cougar?
dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
My mom just walked in on me and my girlfriend about to have sex. All she said was "You're lookin like a fool with your pants on the ground.."
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I put bits of fruit cocktail in the jello shots i made because i knew that they were gonna be the only thing we ate all day
nothing like a walk of shame in front of a cnn news crew to start the morning off right
Well two things you gotta know if you're gonna live here. your alcohol tolerance is gonna need to go up, and people do blow. Get used to it. Nobody is gonna pressure you into it. That shits expensive
when your 30 and im 37 and we're lonely and single, lets make a pact to murder each other.
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's opening her family birthday cards at the bar. So we can pay our tab. Bitches wrote checks :(
That night just went downhill after you pissed yourself while sitting on my lap
I just swiped right for a guy on Tinder solely because it looked like he was holding Zoboomafoo
Do you know how awkward it is to get a dick pic while working at babies r us?
I fucking hate them. They came over and sat on me and made out. On top of me. Who the fuck does that?
All I remember is me taking my automatic nerf gun getting on top of him and saying..."look whos in control now!"
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