I need like a "Cookong High for Idiots" book. Or a car.
His text read: Sex? I replied: Not drunk enough. He bought 4 more rounds and tantalized me with the offer pizza later. This could be the beginning of a beautiful relationship.
Also thongs make me have to fart a lot.
How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish there was a lawn mower version of Roomba so I could just drink and cheer it on from the stoop.
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
having someone tell me to "prepare my vagina" is not really something I want to hear..
had my ear almost bitten off in foreplay. the sex gods do not like me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
Gave her a puke bucket just in case. She filled the bottom of it with tears. Super sad. Although I am super proud she didn't puke. That was a lot of Fireball.
I just met a drunk old lady with a bedazzled life alert alarm around her neck. I love casinos
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
you came home and ate 12 bananas. you really didnt think mom would know you were high?
Randomize